KNOCKED UP (2007)

TITLE
Knocked Up

STARRING
Seth Rogen, Katherine Heigl, Paul Rudd, Leslie Mann, Apatow kids, Jason Segel, Harold Ramis

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
It doesn't tell you that this is possibly the most overrated movie of 2007. Wait, I probably already said that about another movie this year, but I was grossly disappointed by this film. The film is unrealistic in its portrayal of almost all of its characters - which is typical of a Judd Apatow film and any comedy.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
I have problems on so many levels with this movie. There were occasional laughs, but on the whole, the movie's predictable. Maybe you can't always have something as surprising as the 40-Year Old Virgin, which although I didn't love, I thought it was unique and hysterical in no less than five scenes. The real highlight of Knocked Up is the clever and personable Katherine Heigl who warms and enchants as an expectant mom. Rogen plays the same character, as do Rudd and Mann, although we know Rudd is capable of different roles and Mann is so good at that character we don't want her to play someone else. I can't think of a reason to recommend this movie or suggest it to someone else. Given the wide release, I'm guessing most people already watched this movie and rendered a verdict one way or another. Apatow just has a style of writing that is successful for him, but isn't always translated very well beyond the inner-ranks of friends and fans.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
This is a guy film, it may not present itself that way, but it is, really.

SPECIAL FEATURES
If you are a fan of the movie any of these are well worth it.

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BEYOND THE GATES (2005)

TITLE
Beyond the Gates

STARRING
Hugh Dancy, John Hurt

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
Well, it's awful and it's true (the latter of which it tells you). I can't say that there is much which is compelling about this movie - we all know of the strife and unrest which plagues many African nations, not the least of which is Rwanda. Hotel Rwanda was a much better film, but in earnest, especially from the non-native perspective, this film is probably much more accurate - if not less dramatic.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
No. Like I said, there were few highlights. Call it bad acting, poor writing, or just a lack of fresh subject matters. As viewers, much like the rest of the world it is easier to turn our backs on such tragedy. Genocide is a difficult, if not unbearable subject and to sell it, you must capitalize on either a unique angle or an incredible cast. The pictures of the cast and their stories of family and friends lost during those 100 days were the most impactful - unfortunately they waited until the end when credits rolled.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Hard to believe anyone would like this film, but if they did gender one way or another wouldn't be a requisite.

SPECIAL FEATURES
No.

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DEATH PROOF (2007)

TITLE
Death Proof

STARRING
Kurt Russell, Rose McGowan, Rosario Dawson, Tracie Thoms, Zoe Bell, Vanessa Ferlito, Jordan Ladd, Sydney Tamiia Poitier, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Eli Roth,

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
It's a chick flick. Ok, maybe not in the traditional sense of the word, and I know my feminist friends will be a little more than alarmed, but if QT (Quentin Tarantino) were to do a film for the ladies, this is about as good as it would get. That, or Death Proof is like is a deep rooted fantasy, and if that is the case, I'm happy not to see more than I already have. The shortlist of things this movie is:
- graphically violent in ways only Tarantino movies can achieve with realism.
- filmed as an omage to the low-budget 70's style films which shaped QT in ways we cannot imagine.
- the best work I've seen from any of the following: Russell, Dawson, Ferlito.

Things it is not:
- Kill Bill Vol. 1 or 2 - too bad, but everything he does can't be classic.
- Pulp Fiction - thank God (if there is one) that movie is awful and boring - and overrated!
- not very guy-friendly, translation - my husband was bored, and it didn't impress me as something I would find on the shelves of any men (Tarantino fans not withstanding).

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
Well, I rarely like QT's movies, but this one held my attention and the ending was gratifying. I might actually look forward to Planet Terror, but it is from that Spy Kids guy so I will subdue my excitement until an appropriate time. Releasing Grindhouse as separate installments has me kind of baffled. Logic would suggest that you release the stronger of the films first. So, that aside, I would say the one thing I know that this movie proved is you can tell dialogue written by QT from oh, about 100 miles away. It hits you like a Mack truck and I'll say it's pretty good on it's own, but the delivery like in Kill Bill and Death Proof makes it classic. Bell did an amazing job in her scenes - well done all the way around for a film that aspired to do nothing with any fanfare.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
I think this film is for women, not girls and not those women with average sensitivities or sensibilities. I liked it and I am just as likely to watch Kill Bill as I am to watch 13 Going on 30, or Alien.

SPECIAL FEATURES
It's too much to ask me to watch QT's special features........look for Grindhouse to have more in the way of these.
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NEXT (2007)

TITLE
Next

STARRING
Nicholas Cage, Jessica Biel, Julianne Moore

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
The box pretty much sums up the story so let's get right down to synthesizing the story. It's got action, story, a little sci-fi and of course a love story complete with almost a twenty year age difference between Cage and Biel (in real-life).

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
Short stories make the best films - I earnestly believe that, and this movie is based on a short story. It flows nicely and while it's not the best Cage action film, it's pretty darn good. Especially enjoyable is the development of Moore's character. There's a less than satisfying ending, but that is pretty typical of the sci-fi genre which this film flutters in an out of. The purposely nondescript terrorists are less developed than we're used to thinking. If you recall back to the eighties action films, you knew inside and out the flaws of the antagonists, in today's modern films, less time equates to less character development. I'm not sure if this is good or bad, but it is definitely not compelling. Still, Cage is a reliable performer and you know no matter the role, he's going to deliver.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Yep.

SPECIAL FEATURES
Completely skippable!

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THE CONDEMNED (2007)

TITLE
The Condemned

STARRING
Stone Cold Steve Austin, Vinnie Jones, Robert Mammore, Rick Hoffman, Masa Yamaguchi, Tory Mussett

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
It fares better than one might expect and find some inventive ways to do away with bad and good guys. The plot and premise is fairly simple and I think you'll get the details (what few there are) from the first few minutes.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
Austin is a decent action-film actor. My first inclination was to write him off for his pretty face and [ster]roid reinforced physique, but the WWF and WWE is about, if nothing else acting, and Austin was notably one of its biggest stars. We like Vinnie Jones as an antagonist, he delivers! I think we can all agree that reality programming has gotten out of hand, and while this is an extreme it is after all just a movie. This is not a movie one watches with high hopes, but I will give it credit for being more enjoyable than the movie I saw earlier that day in the theatre (thanks a lot Paul W. S. Anderson)

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Definitely a "guy" oriented movie. Girlie viewers will likely find it offensive.

SPECIAL FEATURES
The first meeting between Jones and Austin was worth watching.

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BLADES OF GLORY (2007)

TITLE
Blades of Glory

STARRING
Will Ferrell, Jon Heder, Will Arnett, Amy Poehler, Jenna Fischer, Craig T. Nelson,

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
Ok, so it's not the most ridiculous premise we've ever heard of: two rival male figure skaters (Heder and Ferrell) at their respective peaks are barred from competing in the sport solo as the result of an unforgivable outburst at the closing ceremonies. In an effort to remain practioners of their carefully honed craft, they enter into the world of pairs figure skating, which is dominated by a somewhat incestuous brother/sister duo (Poehler and Arnett). Um, alright when you state it as plainly as possible, it almost sounds plausible (which it is not) and of course, that description is giving the film credit for a lot of sainity, which the film is just incapable of delivering.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
I laughed, but not hard. I had mediocre expectations, they were met. I thought the casting was as good as it could be, it turned out it was. All in all, this is a pretty forgettable film that received quite a lot of attention for not a lot of anything special. There are comical moments, a trivial romance, and some generic good-overcoming-evil-type scenarios. Still, all we can say for certain is that Ferrell has a following, and if the studios won't hype a movie for him, they will. It's not his best performance by far, but Poehler, Arnett, and Nelson fair much better and we get to see them flex that muscle right above their funny bone. Heder is headed for permanent residence in typecast city. For those who don't know, his performances in The Benchwarmers and School for Scoundrels already set his trip in motion. We know Heder as a pansy, geek, and otherwise inept kind of guy; for the size of check he's cashing, he's probably okay with this typecast. I might rent it again, as a Blockbuster Favorites.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Probably.

SPECIAL FEATURES
This is what Ferrell's movie do well. Don't miss the piece on the skater costumes or extended and deleted scenes.

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YEAR OF THE DOG (2007)

TITLE
Year of the Dog

STARRING
Molly Shannon, Regina King, Peter Sarsgaard, John C. Reilly, Laura Dern, Thomas McCarthy

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
No Weimaraners - who are you kidding? This is not a movie about dogs (or people) worth making. I heard the original idea was Laura Kightlinger's and it was about cats, then it was stolen and manipulated by her close friend Mike White, unannounced to her. Of course they are now both in court over it and who really cares? Except, maybe this is a film that Kightlinger could have written better - even if it was originally about cats. What you get is something that tries to be funny, quirky and reverent. On most of those counts, it misses and the bright point of the film ends up being your own comparison of how many of the attributes of the dogs onscreen does your dog at home share.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
This is no Little Miss Sunshine or Napoleon Dynamite. What social commentary Year of the Dog makes is ineffective and the humanity it observes is torture, lacking the comedic undertones we've come to associate with characterizations of the oddities that show up in our daily lives, behaviors, and anecdotes. If you make a movie about life, and it is not an extraordinary one, it must have a poignant revelation that draws a conclusion or fosters a thought provoking revelation, sometime after shutting down the DVD player. Otherwise you might as well stick to the formula comedies and skip the IFC route.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
That depends; the film never saw a wide release and there is a reason for that.

SPECIAL FEATURES
Not really.

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KICKIN IT OLD SCHOOL (2007)

TITLE
Kickin It Old Skool

STARRING
Jamie Kennedy, Maria Menounos, Michael Rosenbaum, Debra Jo Rupp, Christopher McDonald

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
This movie might be too ridiculous to be awful. I'm going to buck the trend here and say a movie about a boy who falls into a coma during the height of 80's pop culture in a freak breakdancing accident, only to awaken twenty years later in the present (just in time to watch his parents foreclose on their home and his dream girl marry his eternal foe), is probably one of the most original films I've seen all year.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
The laughs are genuine and the cast not mentioned above perfectly cast. This isn't a movie for everybody, but it is a movie that everybody who remembers the 80's can find something to recall be it the film's soundtrack, fashion, or just grim memories of our antiquated electronics. Kennedy does this brand of comedy well and somehow, the make-up artist managed to make Menounos look average. If there's anyone whom I had expectations of its Michael Rosenbaum and the class act that he is, he delivers. Progressing from his Sorority Boys days, Rosenbaum tries his hand at being the antagonist everyone can hate.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Yes.

SPECIAL FEATURES
Some are quite funny, but maybe not worth the detour.

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RESIDENT EVIL: EXTINCTION (2007)

TITLE
Resident Evil: Extinction

STARRING
Milla Jovovich, Ali Larter, Oded Fehr, Iian Glen, Ashanti, Mike Epps, Spencer Locke

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
So, this film is just out in theatres and was not previewed for critics (a universally recognized sign of a bad film in which the studio has little faith) therefore not much has been said, yet. Let me be among the first to say no, no, no - this is not how you finish off a trilogy! The first Resident Evil film was as remarkable for its quality as it was for its low-budget, video game inspiration, and interesting casting choice (Jovovich was at best a model, largely known to European fashionistas). The sequel to Resident Evil, entitled Apocalypse, was bonafide success and for those who said the first film was too laden with story to entice the gamin audiences, Apocalypse seemed to quell those criticisms with more action in a grandiose fashion and still maintained witty dialogue. All the while it advanced the storyline and seemed poised to leave us in the perfect place to see Alice's battle against the Umbrella Corporation come full circle.

Alas, this kind of resolution was not meant to be. Audiences hoping to connect Apocalypse with Extinction, for the most part will be disappointed. At first the film doesn't start off with a horrible premise, but scene by scene it becomes more contrived and predictable as we foresee an eventual showdown between Alice and Dr. Isaacs (Glen). Meanwhile, reprising their earlier roles, L.J (Epps) and Carlos Olivera (Fehr) have banded together with a few remaining Raccoon City survivors including the lackluster Claire (Larter) and a forgettable Betty (Ashanti), among others. While I won't tell you who the casualties are (aside from your pocketbooks) or who claims victory in good v. evil's timeless battle, I will say that Jovovich looks amazing. Russell Mulcahy can shoot a glowing pre-baby Jovovich in a way that is not matched by any other.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
This is not a experience to repeat. If there are two or three great sci-fi trilogies out there and this one had the potential to join those ranks, it failed miserably. Mulcahy needed to throw this script out immediately and tell Paul W. S. Anderson to take a hike if he couldn't repeat the intelligence and innovation of the first two films. As for the future of this franchise (which plans to pins its hopes on the Claire and Co. characters) it doesn't look bright. The action in Extinction was bland and the interplay horrible. What should have been said was left hanging in the air and that which was so utterly over-the-top Michael Bay-esque was put out there to ring miserably in the audience's ears. For your $6 - 8 bucks, there are better films out there. It is fitting after seeing the final film in a franchise I wished would never end (Bourne) that I be brought back to the harsh reality of the movie-making machine and remember how most trilogies (including Resident Evil) fail to inspire.

At least it proved Max Brooks's point about the superiority of a machete when battling the undead!

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
It isn't a great date movie.

SPECIAL FEATURES
TBD

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THE DOG PROBLEM (2006)

TITLE
The Dog Problem

STARRING
Giovanni Ribisi, Mena Suvari, Lynn Collins, Scott Caan

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
The box leaves out the part about this movie being a flop - more ways than I can count. What it does well, use a highly trained animal and give Ribisi his chance at being a more mainstream character. By in large the antics come off as ridiculous and not in an endearing fashion. Scene after scene we are asked to believe something that goes against both rational judgement and any semblance of humorous staging. If you could really mess up the brilliantly written and even more charismatically cast/acted Scorched, you would have The Dog Problem.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
I like Scott Caan. He's reliable, though not enough of a reason to venture a second painful rental and excruciating viewing of this movie. Sadly, he is both the writer and director of this movie, so I'm thinking it's a wash. Some actors aren't destined for fame behind the camera, as well as in front of it.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Hmmm, my money is on no.

SPECIAL FEATURES
Yeah, this is a big NO!

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THE BOURNE ULTIMATUM (2007)

TITLE
The Bourne Ultimatum

STARRING
Matt Damon, Julia Stiles, Joan Allen, David Strathairn, Scott Glenn, Albert Finney

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
Who knows what the box will say, probably something about this being the third installment in an action-packed series, blah, blah, blah, Jason Bourne, (subliminal mention about Paul Greengrass, being the most awesome director - because it's likely in his contract) and then a casual note about the plot or Joan Allen because she's a class act, or David Strathairn, because he's so en vogue since that Clooney movie about Murrow.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
So, I already own the other Bourne movies, but this may be my favorite; I never, as a rule, like the third movie better than its predecessors. Perhaps it was the euphoria of spending the weekend in D.C. and taking the Metro to the theatre. Or maybe it is just not having to worry about who is watching Blue while I am out enjoying previews and a movie. It could be that somewhere in the world U of M was victorious (against Notre Dame no less) and that set the tone for the most wonderful trip I have experienced all year at the movies.

More than likely it is because Bourne was the character Matt Damon was meant to play, Greengrass and his cinematographers care more about thrusting you into the film than they do about profit (well, in a perfect world) or the writing in the Bourne series has been just that good. I could rave about the film, but that would defeat the purpose, so let me issue three reasons you should not see this film either on DVD or at the movies (right now):
1. You get motion sickness easily - in earnest, you probably should avoid this film if that is the case. The camera angles are intense and they match the fight scenes, sometimes blow for blow, both of which I love, but not for the faint of heart.
2. You are adverse to good filmmaking - we don't really need to explain that do we?
3. For you, Matt Damon and Ben Affleck come as a pair, and anything less is just blasphemy, sacrilege, or something even more horrible, like the thought of Affleck as a U.S. Senator and Damon as a reality-TV star.

Needless to say, go see The Bourne Ultimatum, even if it is only a two hour reprieve from the daily grind.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Totally, Damon is kickass enough for guys to embrace and still hott enough for women to want.

SPECIAL FEATURES
TBD.......

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PERFECT STRANGER (2007)

TITLE
Perfect Stranger

STARRING
Halle Berry, Bruce Willis, Giovanni Ribisi, Gary Dourdan

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
Why they put out this crap...oh wait it doesn't have to tell you that, we all know it's for the money. Aside from that, we have a predictable thriller, which begins with some actual momentum that it fritters away sometime after the first thirty minutes where it pretends to dull down the incredibly attractive Halle Berry and limits in every possible way the talents of Bruce Willis. Look for Berry's character to have a contemptive past that reveals more of her true character.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
Ribisi is incredible when he is cast as a formidable character whose emotional and psychological problems are normal, as opposed to being cast as the slow guy or dimwit. I am so sick of seeing him in that role. Tomorrow, I will review another movie where he plays a straight character with less success, though admittedly, there is something attractive about him when he has a bout with his bad side. I guess I could rent it again if I was looking for some background noise, but there is nothing exceptional or interesting about this movie. More risky performances from the leads could have turned out an entirely different film. Bad direction!

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Ehhhhh, maybe.

SPECIAL FEATURES
Naw, not really. I would pass on the movie and its so-called extras.

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THE ULTIMATE GIFT (2006)

TITLE
The Ultimate Gift

STARRING
James Garner, Abigail Breslin, Drew Fuller, Ali Hillis, Lee Meriweather, Brian Dennehy, Bill Cobbs

WHAT THE BOX DOESN'T TELL YOU
As the DVD queued up, I saw previews for Fox Faith films and experience what can only be likened to an immediate visceral reaction of remorse for having selected a film that was probably going to be too "preachy" for me to bear. Expectations were immediately lowered and all I can say is that I was wrong to do so. This movie is vibrant, well-intention and though I thought this film was about a rich man who was going to have to donate an organ for little girl to survive ( and I was completely wrong about this) it was incredibly well constructed. From the script to the acting to the direction, The Ultimate Gift, has the market cornered on quality over quantity. I take issue with only a couple things below which largely have nothing to do with the film except the performance of little Abigail Breslin as Emily, the outspoken tenacious child whose scheming brings meaning to her final days.

WHY I WOULD RENT IT AGAIN
You don't see a movie like this with twelve copies stacked on your Blockbuster shelves without some big names attached. Those come in the form of James Garner, Brian Dennehy, and Breslin, whose Academy Award nomination last year for the role of Olive in Little Miss Sunshine has propelled her artificially to the highest of acting ranks. My predictions are that she will be lucky survive child fame as Anna Paquin did. Like Breslin, Paquin experienced some early accolades, but has more recently combined some large-scale and independent projects to prove she has staying power. Unfortunately, most child actors don't have staying power and I cannot see Breslin aging well, but she is obviously capable of learning and delivering lines. In this movie she is nothing short of annoying (as she is meant to be), but lacks the endearing qualities that can make annoying attractive (an unintended and somewhat unavoidable consequence of translating the written word and its characters to film). Garner is spot on, but the triumph is the relatively unknown Drew Fuller whose performance as rogue heir Jason Stevens is central to the story, but also amazingly deep. The story is touching and while there are red moments (cries of conservatism) everyone loves to believe people can learn how to be more grateful and conscientious through adversity. On occasion, this is true. When it is, I hope it's much like the revelation the Stevens character experienced.

WILL MY GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND LIKE IT?
Yes. Even my husband enjoyed the film, much to his shock and surprise.

SPECIAL FEATURES
Well it is loaded, but one of the nicer features is that the film is enhanced for the visually impaired and features some interesting commentary from the author of the The Ultimate Gift book who is blind.

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